Phones, church, internet, flies

In an age when we read our phones and listen to our books, the only communication skill that is still developing is shouting.

I prefer the church to the internet, as it is a better all-round sensory experience. The bells online are great but the internet doesn’t do the smells.

When the resident house fly forgets itself and starts exhibiting its horse fly cousin’s table manners at my dining room table, I correct behaviour with a rolled-up copy of the Spectator magazine.